i couldn't eat..i couldn't sleep...my minds on her..every second..every minute...took a look at her portrait...which i took secretly on my cell...never got sick of it...maybe i should ask for her name...maybe i should ask her out? maybe i should not sound desperate...take it slow...
my minds set...its v day...a simple rose on my hand...its for her...u got to do it...those words keep repeating in my head...the "what ifs" questions never fail to bug me...what if she says no?...what if she laughs at me and remind me who i am? well..ure special to me...but i'm a creep to u...stop this nonsense i say..of coz to myself...i shook off my head...trying to focus..no matter what outcome...take one step at a time...take it slow...
"thhiss iss ffoor u", damn...jitters all over me...whats wrong with me...damn man...u blew it...then i heard the cute little giggles that melted my heart before...she reached out her hand..."thank u"...aaaaww...the sweet voice definitely mesmerised me..."but sorry, ive got to go"..."ermm..ok" i didnt know wat to say...as i watched her leave...something struck me..oh dear...whats her name again?as dumb as i can get...thats the priority n i forgot bout it...its ok its ok...stage 1's clear...theres always tomorrow...take it slow...take it slow...
15 feb 2001...i was thinking of what to say when i meet her...on the way to school...with smiles on my face..turned into despair...whos that with her...they acted as though they're lovebirds...or maybe they are...with her arms wrapped around his...could a brother be so loving...to add fuel into a burning flame...they're lips were locked...sure enough...its like rubbing salt to my wound...like breaking my legs which were already crippled...my heart wrenched..trying to make myself invisible when im already unnoticed..maybe i should drift myself away from her...who to blame u might ask?me being me...i wont blame others but myself...for taking it slow...
still searching the light @ 4:46 PM